Bite the Fruit — Relationship Health

Cultivating connection with your partner is vital to the success of your relationship. Setting time aside, even when time is limited, should be a priority. Feeling disconnected with one's partner is quite common. Couples are constantly assailed by everyday stresses: different work schedules, a new baby, money anxiety, health concerns, job pressures, etc. Sometimes even happy events add to the tension in relationships: planning a wedding, a visit from the in-laws, holiday dinners, etc. Carving out quality time with one's partner becomes another chore to add to a long to-do list. In the back of our minds, we know that...

I want to be in a relationship but I’m not motivated to date Falling in love is one of the best feelings in the world. Being able to share your day-to-day experiences with the person you love is a truly transformative experience. However, the road is often not easy or even enjoyable. Dating can be rough. Not everyone is lucky in love. Some of us have to kiss a few frogs before we meet the right person. If you’ve ever experienced heart-break, you’ll understand how that can affect your self-esteem and make you question if you’ll ever find love again....

You’re at home on a work night. Your partner had a brutal day and needs to vent. “My boss was a jerk,” your partner says, “and I feel like none of my colleagues like me.”“I have an idea,” you respond. “Maybe you should organize a happy hour to clear the air.”“You’re not listening. My boss is just a jerk, plain and simple. I’ve tried being nice, and it’s impossible with her. Nobody in the office gets this kind of treatment.”“I hear you. I’m just trying to help. And if you organize that happy hour, you might—”“Stop trying to help me...

Having a fight? “You’re overreacting” will only make it worse. Couples’ counselors will witness their sessions devolve into an argument often as a result of a simple phrase. ‘I never said that,’ for example, ensures an hour-long (and perhaps into the drive home and the coming week), debate on what the person did or did not say. Here’s a quick list of phrases that couples should avoid saying, why we should avoid them, and what to say instead: Generalizations “You always …” and “You never …” These terms are often exaggerations, and they don’t acknowledge any effort the listening partner...

However, who’s practicing it? Everyone is talking about polyamory. Is it really popular? Or are people only saying it is? Perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy might be at work: Polyamory becomes more widespread because we think it’s already widespread. Norms around sexuality change because we think they’ve changed — even if they haven’t. Nontraditional sexual relationships, of course, are as old as time itself. In the 1960s and ’70s, a generation of Americans became acquainted with “free love” only to settle into monogamous relationships when they got older. “Polyamory” entered the lexicon with 1997’s “The Ethical Slut,” a book now considered...